Regret (Rin X Reader X Haru) Zombie!AU

~A/N: Listen As You Read! www.youtube.com/watch?v=SxDGAo… ~









    Guilt was such an undeniably devouring emotion, consuming all in its way and gnawing at the pieces that refused to be knocked down. It was a concept followed by denial, another horrid thing that kept you from accepting what lay in front of you. Trailing behind it was an abundance of remorse, practically swallowing you whole with its irrefutable strength. To some, guilt was the champion, standing high above them with a foot set upon their motionless form. Although to others, they either learned to live with it, or overcame it with courage and durability deep within their hearts. Yet for the two young men standing silently over the makeshift headstone in the ground, guilt had yet to absorb them, but it had already begun its course of taking away their pride, one second at a time.

    She had been one to succumb to the horrors of the world she was forced to live in. She gave into her surroundings and allowed all of the negative thoughts in her mind to engulf her, leaving her as nothing but the feeling of helplessness. After being forced to put down one of her friends, she began to see the dark side of the universe, and left what little hope she had in the dust.


    She put a gun to her head and pulled the trigger.


    That hadn't always been the way she thought she would go. Maybe it would be a heroic death, jumping in front of her friend just as a monster bit down onto her shoulder, or leaving herself as bait as the others got away. But no. She died of stress. And her last words were, "I'm a coward." before the shot echoed throughout the forest.

    Haru had been the first to see the small note she left, on a dirtied piece of paper that looked at if it had been left crumpled in her pocket for weeks. And without a word he ran to where he knew she'd be, followed close behind by Rin who pummeled him with a thousand questions and more. Yet as they arrived to the clearing she stood in, with the silver handgun gripped tightly in her palm, her watery eyes met theirs before she uttered those three simple words.


    "I'm a coward."


    At first they blamed each other, yelling at one another after her limp figure hit the ground with a hard thump. Saying they hadn't gotten there in time, that one never spoke to the other about the situation. But in the end, after they had threatened to kill one another, they slowed and began blaming themselves.

    Rin had crumpled to the ground by her side, desperately clutching at the maroon liquid spilling out of the spot of where her ear used to be. He kept telling himself that all was just a dream, that if he cried hard enough he'd wake up to see her asleep by the fire. Haru merely leaned against a tree, clenching his jaw as tears quietly slid down his cheeks.

    They buried her silently.

    The magenta-eyed boy felt as if he hadn't gotten there in time to save her, like if could have talked to her just for a moment longer she may have allowed the gun to clatter to the earth. He could have run to her and knocked it out of her hand before the bullet touched a single hair on her head. The jet-haired boy thought he could have helped her, even before she made the decision he had realized her unnatural dismal and pessimistic attitude towards nearly everything. Maybe he could have pulled her aside, try to remove all of the nonsense swimming in her mind.

    Yet, they were both too late, and their hearts were full of regret.

    So as they stood over the lump of dirt above where her body was concealed, they traced her name in the earth, and put a stick to mark her grave. They could feel the heartache of one another nearly radiating off their forms, all of the guilt and regret piling onto a block of anguish.

    They left, and never dared to speak a word about her again. Or else they may have ended up doing the same as she did.